When you’re in a relationship, your world can get a little smaller. Suddenly you are not just you anymore. Your plans and your entire future could now contain another person. It’s an exciting time to be in love.
The world somehow seems newer, brighter even. Although nothing else has changed in your life.
It’s not a bad thing, but being in love generally means you only get googly eyes for one person and ignore the rest of the pack. It’s cute, it’s Insta-worthy, and it’s hard to give up.
One of the most difficult parts of breaking up is adjusting to being single. Trade the daily sweet lunch dates for chipotle eating in front of your computer and trade snuggling up in bed for being alone after a bottle of wine.
In a way, you also mourn someone. Hopefully they are no longer in your life so you can heal and move on properly.
But you’ve lost someone in a way. And it’s not just one person you lose. You lost the future you thought you would have.
You may even have had to lose some friends because the memories were too hard. It’s okay to take the time and heal from whatever you’ve lost.
And by far the strangest adjustment you make after ending a long-term relationship is dating other people.
I know it sounds scary and awful and like a bunch of sweaty dudes wanting to pee your pants while also calling you “bro,” but I promise it’s not.
It’s really fun if you do it right. It is crucial that you and the other people you are dating are on the same page as what you are looking for. It’s also important that you only date people who can communicate with you
And I know it feels like your ex is the best thing ever and he was the only guy for you, but I promise he’s not.
Life is about change, weird, frightening change. And if the only thing keeping your single ass at home is the idea that “all good guys are taken,” then you’re lying to yourself.
Everything feels so permanent right now, but it’s not. Everything – and everyone – is temporary.
So instead of clinging to the idea that your ex was the one who got away, start living with the mindset that even people are replaceable.
Your happiness does not depend on anyone but you. No matter what happens, no matter who enters or leaves your life, you will be fine.
You, your heart and your soul are the only things you truly have that are irreplaceable.
